My morning routine is one of the most cherished parts of my day. Over time it became the dance of self-love and self-compassion so I can have the headspace to be the person I want to be. It is the single, most important ingredient that triggered positive intention while I was in the middle of deep struggle and feelings of overwhelm.
I drink my tea in silence, I meditate, speak gratitude, and journal the noise out of my head.
And most recently, I added a very simple ingredient that helps to make my interaction with the kids more joyous.
You see, last year I had an epiphany. I thought many times about my job as a mother and my role in my children’s lives. And after much reading, introspection and meaningful conversations, I realized that I have no control over my children’s perceptions and memories. I don’t know what they will remember from these years, and I have no way of predicting how they perceive my actions, reactions, or parenting style.
So I slowly moved my focus away from these and redirected it towards JOY, FUN, PLAYFULNESS, LAUGHTER, LOVE.
I can control those by focusing on living a joyful, fun and happy life. And they will (or maybe they won’t, which is irrelevant) be inspired by it.
So last year I sat down and narrowed down my parenting values to 3 words that can be action-packed.
Then I made them look pretty and hang them up in my office. Every morning, as I prepare to go to my kid’s bedroom, I read out loud these words:
It is tangibly showing my love for them – through touch, play, cuddles, and words. We validate our love physically, because sometimes when it’s hard, we need to be reminded of connection and love this way. I wake them up with a hug, foot massage or back rub, we embrace when we say goodbye or hello, we have pillow fights and tickle machines.
For me, this means seeking individual time with each one of my kids. Each one of them has a weekly one-hour date with me, and this has worked wonders for our feelings of belonging together.
It is also represented when I look them in the eye when I speak to them, coming to their body level, being acutely aware of the tone of voice I use and practicing fully listening when they talk.
This has been a slippery slope for me for many years. I was hard on people because I was very hard on myself. When I decided to change my inner dialogue and speak to myself with the same kindness I would show a scared four-year-old, everything changed. Compassion for me means assuming positive intent regardless of behavior, as well as believing there are always opportunities to do things right.
Yes, you messed up and did something that you shouldn’t have done/ something I didn’t agree with/ something that made me feel hurt, and even though I didn’t like it, I believe in your goodness, and I believe you will do your best to fix this.
This not only applies to my kids, partner, family, friends and other people I encounter, but it is paramount that it starts with myself.
So I look at these prints and the meaning I gave them and get reminded, every single day, of how I want to live my life and feel about my days.
If you’d like a copy of these printables, put your email address in the box below, and I will send them to you.